50!

Judd and I are approaching our 15th wedding anniversary. I've known Judd since I was 13 - I met him in Spanish class. I was sitting by myself, nervous and confused. He came in, the only way he knew how - not loud but certainly confident and bordering on arrogant. He scanned the room, walked around trying to decide where to sit and finally settled next to me. I noticed him but I paid as little attention as possible - I was still too stricken. I was a new student and this was my first ever language class. Cute boy, I thought, but probably a snob.

He shocked me by introducing himself and asking for my name, making small talk here and there. I can't remember what he said, I was just...shocked. He would be the first boy I would meet at Hong Kong International School. It was 1983, I was 13, fresh from an all girl Catholic school in the Philippines. Shocked is a mild term.

It is strange how our lives and paths crossed again many, many years later - resulting in a mad love affair that led to a wedding 9 months into the relationship. I have known Judd for about 26 years. A long time for sure....but imagine if we knew each other for 50 years. Imagine...being married for 50!



Tomorrow, on February 7, 2009, Judd's parents Sid and Lorraine will celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary. This is a milestone that I cannot even fathom. Although I am worried about getting old too fast, I do feel like I've been around for a very long time already. Yet, I am only turning 40 this year. Fifteen years of being married to Judd, I feel like we have gone through so much: utter joy, great love, frustration, anger, forgiveness, boredom, excitement, you name it. Our aim is to walk along a tree lined path, old and gray, holding hands. Certainly, our aim is to one day celebrate our 50th wedding anniversary.

My Mother-in-law is half paralized. She suffered 2 strokes in her lifetime. I knew her from when I was still a teenager - but I doubt she would have remembered me. When I met her, this time as my boyfriend's Mother, she stood erect - also very confident, clearly a woman in charge. She commanded my respect. Kind, cheerful and clearly, Judd loved her fiercely.

My Father-in-law, he's a proud man. He held a high position at work and very popular, it seemed. The first time I met him, he overwhelmed me a bit. Okay, he intimidated me. He's got a big personality and I don't think anyone would disagree with me on that.

In all the years I have known them, they have bickered, they have laughed - but they were always together, especially after Mom suffered her second stroke in 1995. They were on their homeleave, staying at their house in Boaz, Alabama. They never went back to Hong Kong after that - Mom had to relearn everything again.

They have this rhythm going. It's the same everyday but I think it offers them both a sense of comfort. It's never easy but it's also like a well rehearsed dance. They're not getting any younger - these days, even their rhythm is threatened by their age. There are many moments of worrying, complaining....but I can't help but admire them anyway. I think, at the end of the day, when they retreat to their bedroom, they lay in bed just happy that the other is still there, still cozy to the touch, still breathing, still alive. They have gone through a lot and they are still together.




In a few months, my own parents will be celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary. For now, this post is to honor Sid and Lorraine Rossuck.

Happy 50th Anniversary Mom and Dad. We love you.